Blessings....by Laura Story

Great Song - You need to listen and remember...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mmgV6mPvb0

I feel sad today. Don't know why. And once again, God gave me a song and reminded me that He is my savior and I need to rest at his feet. I hope you can find rest in your blessings today.

(Lyrics)

We pray for blessings, we pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering

All the while You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?

What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough

And all the while You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?

And what if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

When friends betray us, when darkness seems to win
Visit http://www.xtralyrics.com
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can't satisfy?

And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?

Some Things are Worth Repeating

Below is a song by Mercy Me....Just when I need to hear it and be reminded as my day goes out of control (*like it was ever actually in control...)

The days will come when you don't have the strength
When all you hear is you're not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU ARE MADE FOR SO MUCH MORE THAN ALL OF THIS
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU ARE TREASURED, YOU ARE SACRED, YOU ARE HIS
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL

I'm praying that you have the heart to find (I think this should be FIGHT)
Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
They are NOTHING in the shadow of the cross

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU ARE MADE FOR SO MUCH MORE THAN ALL OF THIS
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL
YOU ARE TREASURED, YOU ARE SACRED, YOU ARE HIS
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He posessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skies above
YOU'RE THE ONE HE MADLY LOVES....ENOUGH TO DIE!

You're Beautiful
You're Beautiful
In His Eyes.....

Beautiful Jealousy

He is jealous for me
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy
When all of a sudden
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
And I realise just how beautiful You are
And how great Your affections are for me

And O how He loves us
Oh, O how He loves us
How He loves us all

We are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking
So Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets
When I think about the way

HE LOVES US!

(David Crowder Band, "How He Loves"

So Tired of it all!

Do you ever feel like you run out of time for the day or the week or the month? I feel like I am constantly planing things in my little head that fall through or disappear (in my little head)!

I could swear to you that I blogged several times during April. I just knew that I had used my new fancy phone app and that I blogged about my life, nope...or maybe I thought about blogging about my life at home because my phone pictures are blurry. Of course that would require that I turn on my computer at home, which seems like a tremendously difficult task considering the fact that I sit in front of a computer ALL day at work! I just can't make myself sit at another desk. Not when there is such quality programming on after my children stop fighting and get to sleep!

If you know me, you probably know that life has been extraordinarily difficult in the last few months. If you don't know me, you might want to click the button at the top of the screen for the next blog. Or go to some of my favorites...Amber's Blog  Kate's Blog  Jo's Blog  Jana's Blog ....there are so many.

(you ready?)

Our family has been facing some extreme times. Extreme highs and extreme lows...and they are exhausting. My dad had a stroke 2 years ago. He will be 57 on Sunday. It was a pretty bad one. He is paralyzed on his left side. It is not fun to talk about.

In August of last year my dad was put on hospice because his cardiac output was under 20%. To me this means that 20% of his heart works. He has a fibrillator from his heart attack he had about 10 years ago. We've known that his heart was weak. We knew he was getting weaker. I think I knew it. Sometimes it is hard to remember what I know or think or feel and how long it has been that way. The "blah-ness" of it seems to mush together in the toilet of life. (gross)

So we didn't think he would be here at Thanksgiving....but Granddad wasn't supposed to be either and he made it through two....Then we were kinda worried about Christmas....then we were told in January that he had a week to live..he was still with us in February...then in March my brother got married.....then in April he went to hospice....then we were told he was in kidney failure (Monday) and would be in a coma by Thursday and in Heaven by Monday....then the following Tuesday (yes, one day after he was going to be in Heaven) they decided to send him home because (in my opinion...) he wasn't dying fast enough.

Now we are in May....Dad's birthday is upon us. (*And AUNT JO's by the way...Happy Birthday beautiful! Lucinda Rocks!) And it seems to me that we are still sprialing in the same circumstances of life that feel like they are trying to pull us under. And I just don't know what I am supposed to do with it. And I just don't know how I am supposed to feel about it.

Part of the difficulties I have experienced is understanding who he is or what he knows. I know that part of him left with the stroke. I forget that things are not the same because he is still sitting in the chair in his underwear covered with a blanket when guests arrive...just like in high school.

But now he is in a hospital bed.
But now he doesn't have the same sense of humor he had before.
But now he isn't the same and he can't do things for himself (instead of just not wanting to because mom would).
But now I have children that are going to grow up having faded memories of this man that was larger than life.

And I just don't know what's next.

Do you ever feel like you run out of time for the day or the week or the month?

But in the midst of it all....I am still praising HIM for who he always is...and will continue to be!